Finding certainty in all this uncertainty
Leaning into this mystery
The last two weeks at work have been anything but stable. Leadership shake-ups have led to key figures being let go— a re-org is underway, and even my own manager seems to have vanished without a trace. For a lot of us at this organization, the most shared identifiable scent is that of uncertainty. Beyond the office walls, the turbulence isn’t any less pronounced. The state of the economy, the shifting political landscape, and the general unease rippling through the country have left many around me grappling with the same unsettling question—what happens next? What happens to me next?
In my personal life, the instability I see around me feels like a mirror of my own experience. An unexpected trip to the dog ER because Milo had been pooping a lot of blood, a text that begins with “we need to talk,” and a sudden family call that turns into a conversation about unavoidable, unplanned expenses are a fraction of the random unexpected events I have dealt with. Every moment now is an expectation for another shoe to drop. My social media page is filled with all the news and commentary of the current regime. Even if I turned away from all the noise, I’m bombarded by family with videos and texts about the state of the country and concerns about my immigration status and the new changes the administration is making.
It’s like I can’t catch a break!
Like I mentioned in my last podcast episode, where I talked about the place of practice after deconstructing religion, even these moments of uncertainty are an invitation—an opportunity for dharma, a chance to engage in practice. All in all, there’s a beautiful reminder of the two things that are certain:
Uncertainty is certain: The nature of reality is that everything that appears, everything we can witness, be it our thoughts, events, circumstances, status, property, possessions, ideas, concepts, every single thing changes. And no thing gives a definite expiration date for when it changes. They all appear and disappear. Resting in this knowing automatically demands that one look at the next certain point:
That which sees the Uncertain: If we can see that all things change, there is that that witnesses the passing of appearances. That which observes remains untouched by what it sees—unchanging, steady, and ever-present.
To go deeper into that last point, there is a Sweet Sweetness that sees through the illusion of the stories of all that changes. In remembrance, when I see my Self, seeing through the illusion of Maya, it’s easy to see that like any dream whether it presents itself as an interesting dream or as a nightmare, there’s the subject of the dream that’s not touched by the projection of all of the dream’s objects. Just like the dream, the character is not real, the events are not real. The reality of the dream is in the dreamer Itself. Now, none of this is to bypass the seemingly real effects of our lived experience. No! Instead, in the recognition of the dream being a dream, I find I’m able to engage with the objects of the dream with much more boldness, seeing that what appears is not as it seems.
Finding Peace Despite All The Chaos
How then might I find peace in the midst of all the chaos and uncertainty? It seems so obvious that when we focus on anything, we become lost in the object of our attention. Just like the movies, if you focused on a movie, you become one with the going-ons of the movie. You may tense when the protagonist is going through a tough time, you may cry when a character suffers. You are totally embedded in the narrative of the story. Likewise, when we are stuck with the stories of our lives, we fail to see that they are just that stories. We become so engrossed with the ‘my life’ that we don’t see that to a large extent and depending on how you bend to see reality for what it really is, the story of ‘my life’ is imaginary. What falls out of this recognition is the seeing that everything that truly exists is this very moment in its rawness! That rawness is experienced not mentally but through the immediacy of our senses without a need for the mind’s interpretation of what’s clearly outpouring. This is not escapism. This is just reality as it really is without the commentary of thoughts.
These times are rid with more obvious unpredictable patterns. We say that history repeats itself, yet we will experience life in its fresh surprises. It would then make sense to navigate the world we are living with even more care, with different plans and outlook. But the truth is we will never know what the future looks like. Any speculation about tomorrow is just imaginary— only a projection of the mind. For all we know, one may be hit by a bus or randomly win the lottery. We know nothing about tomorrow! But there is something that’s blatantly obvious and certain: that we are. Now, I will attempt to rephrase that to reflect your own direct experience of seeing this truth in a different lens: you are! That you are is a miracle that cannot be produced by anything on earth. It cannot even be seen or known. The life that makes you you is a bloody mystery. In that mystery, we can lean. We can stay in it. We can live in this mystery. Somehow, just somehow, running into this Mysterious Tower is where we find safety!
Oh, that you are is a big big mystery! It is the biggest mystery!
Contemplative Currents is a free (bi-weekly) newsletter that aims to shed light into our daily experiences as opportunities for contemplation of this glorious Mystery. If you'd like to support my work, please consider subscribing and/or sharing this free Substack. If you’re looking to monetarily support, buying my book, This Glorious Dance: Thoughts & Contemplations About Who We Are, is enough. I'm grateful for your support in whatever capacity.